The Power of Forgiveness
12 years ago
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Saturday, June 4, 2011
Monday, November 29, 2010
My wall
My wall by ClinicallyClueless on Polyvore.com
defenses versus reality
who I am with and without defenses
Thursday, March 11, 2010
On Monday, February 1, 2010 my Grandma passed away. When she became ill, she lasted about two weeks. Previously, she was spunky, silly, loving and full of life. Our entire family was with her when she passed away. It is quite difficult for anyone to understand my grief, for she helped to raise me and for several years, I lived with my grandparents. Sometimes, I get the feeling from others including my family that she was "only my grandmother."
They left a great legacy. Despite all of the in fighting and disagreements and people not speaking to each other, we all came together as a family. We set aside our differences and grudges and focused on Grandma and supporting each other. My grandparents formed us to "always" be a family in the tough times.
Dr. David Kessler, Grief and Loss Specialist for Tributes.com offers the best and the worst things to say to someone in this grief state :
The Worst Things to Say:
* At least she lived a long life, many people die young.
* He is in a better place.
* She brought this on herself.
* There is a reason for everything.
*Aren’t you over him yet? He has been dead for a while now.
My Additions: Things that I've heard or have been told.
*It is part of life.
*What did she die of?
*You have your memories of her.
*When was the last time you saw her?
*Were you close?
*At least she is not in pain anymore?
*It was good she went quickly, so she didn't suffer.
*Was she a Christian.
*She is with the Lord now.
*She is with your Grandpa now.
*I understand, when my __________, I___________.
The Best Things to Say:
* I am so sorry for your loss.
* I wish I had the right words, just know I care.
* I don’t know how you feel, but I am here If can help in anyway.
* You and your loved one will be in my thoughts.
* My favorite memory of _________ is _________
My additions:
*Listen to them talk.
*Allow them to laugh and cry.
*It is okay for you to cry also.
*Hug the person
*Send a sympathy card.
*Be there for them.
*Let them grieve in their own time...everyone grieves at different rates and may come up after a long while.
*Provide support or an outing on anniversary dates (i.e. holidays, her birthday, the date of her death, etc...
*Be specific with what type of help you want to give. i.e. grocery shop, make or take telephone calls, provide a meal at the date they specify, etc...
I love you Grandma and miss you!!!
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Tribute to my Father-in-law
I love you!! I will miss your love, smile and your tenderheart. Thank you for making me such a wonderful husband. He will remind me of you. Monday, April 20, 2009
Still Learning to "BE" ~ Healing Journey
Accepting how scared and angry,
I was at being in the hospital for pneumonia
Is something I could not face.
Flashbacks and nightmares increasing
as the month went by all because
I was at being in the hospital for pneumonia
Is something I could not face.
Flashbacks and nightmares increasing
as the month went by all because
feeling out of control and helpless
it was something I could not embrace.
I’ve already talked enough about it,
the details and even wrote a letter.
But, I continued not to feel emotionally any better.
I lived in fantasy world with everything
twisted, just to survive.
Now, to live there continues to deprive.
This I learned to slowly die as my way of being
To “be” is what I need to do and
fight back the lies I’m slowly seeing.
The lies that tell me “Don’t talk,“
“I’m okay,” “I don’t need anyone” and “I’ll be just fine.”
The constant banter in my head is not benign.
Those and other lies lead to
self-injury and other self-destructive ways
For this therapy sometimes feels like a maze.
Therapy has saved and opened my life to who I really am
Someone that deserved much more than I received
And, too often instead I was betrayed and deceived.
Now, into the Father’s arms I securely belong
In Him and others, I finally find security and comfort
But, learning to do that for myself takes much effort.
it was something I could not embrace.
I’ve already talked enough about it,
the details and even wrote a letter.
But, I continued not to feel emotionally any better.
I lived in fantasy world with everything
twisted, just to survive.
Now, to live there continues to deprive.
This I learned to slowly die as my way of being
To “be” is what I need to do and
fight back the lies I’m slowly seeing.
The lies that tell me “Don’t talk,“
“I’m okay,” “I don’t need anyone” and “I’ll be just fine.”
The constant banter in my head is not benign.
Those and other lies lead to
self-injury and other self-destructive ways
For this therapy sometimes feels like a maze.
Therapy has saved and opened my life to who I really am
Someone that deserved much more than I received
And, too often instead I was betrayed and deceived.
Now, into the Father’s arms I securely belong
In Him and others, I finally find security and comfort
But, learning to do that for myself takes much effort.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
